Freedom of the Press Is Not Free

Classified Ads Section from New News Newspaper, 1975 – by Julie, age 6

By Julie A. Ryan

I’m a fan of words. Big fan. Thanks to Trump, the value of being able to use them freely for expression—and for documenting the world we live in—just went up exponentially.

I’ve had a passion for making newspapers and newsletters ever since I was six years old. I would read the newspapers in my childhood home and feel in awe of the power that a bundle of folded pages had. In a world filled with an overwhelming amount of information for me to learn, I appreciated that a presentation of ink and paper arranged in a certain way existed to tell people what was most important to know. I loved the orderliness of newspapers. The first article on the front page was the most important to know. As a child who was wanting to devour every piece of information, I loved the idea that there was a physical object I could consume to make sure I was taking in what I needed to in order to stay in the know. The nightly news on the TV that I loved listening to also gave me the same sense of security that I was doing what I needed to do to be an informed citizen. If you’re feeling skeptical after reading the words in this paragraph because that’s not normal six-year-old behavior, you are completely correct in thinking that—I was not a normal six-year-old.

Starting at the age of six, for fun, I would make my own newspapers and newsletters complete with my favorite section—classified ads. By the time I was in high school, I was also making fun of ads in the Sunday newspaper that featured products marketed to older people. I lampooned companies like the Franklin Mint, Blair, and Habband for Her by inserting additional words into the text that called attention to how ridiculous I thought the products were. I discovered I was a natural at using my love of words for satire. My dream job at the time was to write for Saturday Night Live.

When I was a teenager in the 1980s, New York City seemed like a scary place that I would never actually move to. I knew it was unlikely I would work for SNL. So then I considered becoming a journalist so I could get paid for my habit of playing with words and newspapers. But my high school journalism teacher told my mom at a school conference that I was “too creative and lacked substance.” So that contributed to me doing two things: 1) amping up the creative delivery of the assignments my journalism teacher gave me just to irritate him and 2) seriously considering pursuing my childhood desire to be an executive in the advertising world like Darrin Stephens on the TV show Bewitched so that I could get paid to create jingles and images.

In college I studied the art of propaganda and got the degrees that would equip me with what I needed to enter the world of advertising, but after graduating life took me on an different path for a variety of reasons. Even though I didn’t arrive at the destination I envisioned, throughout my journey I indulged in my passion for wordplay by writing newsletters for various companies, poetry, essays, novels, and my own parody of a political newspaper loaded with satirical articles similar to that of The Onion.

To promote my lampoon newspaper that had political “news” written under a funny pen name, I would post links to my social media accounts and tell people to check out the link to a great article I had read. The articles were actually intentionally poorly written—by me—just quick little impulsive bursts of funny thoughts and images about Trump and the GOP to make my followers smile. Twitter followers responded positively and made it fun to keep sharing my silly articles. Connecting with like-minded people in that way helped me survive Trump’s first term and the COVID-19 pandemic shutdown, and the on-going antics of certain GOP goons. In 2021 Facebook shut down my personal account when I shared a link to one of my satirical articles and one of my “friends” reported me for posting lies on Facebook.

Being canceled by Facebook in 2021 disturbed me for three reasons: 1) the “news” article I shared was a completely ridiculous one about testicles being found in Trump’s Oval Office desk drawer when he was moving out and Biden was moving in after the Inauguration, and the title of my newspaper had a word in it that literally means a lampoon posted in a public place; satirical writing  2) on the heels of Trump’s insurrection at the Capitol a couple of weeks earlier, Facebook was appearing to step into dangerous constitutional territory by limiting the free speech of the wrong American citizens while Trump’s cult members that I knew were still allowed to post on Facebook that Trump had won the 2020 election instead of Biden 3) I personally knew everyone I was friends with on Facebook, so that meant I had a friend or family member in my midst who was actually dumb enough to believe I was trying to pass off the article about the discovered body parts as real, and they were vindictive enough to report me to Facebook and get my account shut down.

Had I actually been publishing a real news source in 2021, Facebook was deciding that freedom of the press was something that wasn’t afforded to me on their platform. Eventually, someone at Facebook reversed the decision and my account was reactivated. I would give anything to have been a fly in the brains of the people at Facebook when they thought my satirical article was real and then when they realized it wasn’t. D’OH! Most fifth graders should have been able to discern that my silly article was a lampoon. That experience provided significant insight regarding how people I associated with could possibly believe the lies Trump and his cronies were telling. Their critical reasoning skills were demonstrably deficient.

And I had been demonstrably gullible. I believed the words in my childhood textbooks and the words in my country’s Constitution that speech and documenting what is happening in my country is a right that is free for me to embrace because I live in a democracy. Technically, freedom of speech and freedom of the press are afforded to those who live in a democracy. So my gullibility actually was wrapped up in assuming that the democratic nation I lived in would never be overrun by an autocrat and his self-serving administration.

I eventually took a break from posting to my political lampoon during a health crisis I’ve been dealing with so I could pour my time and energy into things that I prioritized as most important. But after Trump was elected again in 2024—thanks to so many Americans lacking critical reasoning skills—I officially shut down my newspaper and scrubbed evidence of links to it in my social media accounts. I took these extreme measures because I believed it was possible that Stephen Miller, Trump’s Deputy Chief of Staff for Policy and Homeland Security Advisor (a.k.a. the Antichrist and Master Architect of Evil who whispers in Trump’s ear), along with his Christian Nationalist cohorts could find a way to make certain forms of journalism illegal. And they could find a way to punish people who published things they disagreed with. I didn’t tell anyone that I was concerned with erasing the lampooned trail that Trump’s gestapo might someday follow to find me so they could punish me. I knew from my experience in 2015 that it can take years for people to finally see the merit in my political views. Over the past year, I’ve experienced withdrawal from not being able to make satirical posts about Trump and his merry band of idiots in his second administration. The snarky articles could have written themselves on a daily basis because their ridiculous actions provided so much comic material.

But there’s nothing funny anymore about what Trump’s team of Christian Nationalists are doing to our country. America’s 250-year experiment with democracy is failing as checks and balances are systematically being destroyed. American citizens in Minnesota who weren’t born with Nordic-white skin have to carry identification to prove they have a right to be on the streets of Minneapolis. U.S. citizens are being kidnapped from their Minnesota homes and are being plucked out of their cars to be taken to jail for having the wrong skin color or wrong accent. The Founding Fathers’ mission to create a democratic nation that affords liberty and justice for all is rapidly failing under the tyranny of one man—Donald J. Trump. Republicans in Congress—who had so many opportunities to check Trump and his administration—saw the warning signs that this day was coming. But for self-serving reasons, they have been letting our democratic experiment trend toward failure since 2017. We can no longer speak freely on the sidewalks of Minnesota without the fear of getting killed for doing so by Border Patrol or ICE agents. People who weren’t born with the privilege of having white skin can no longer safely leave their homes to work, buy groceries, or send their kids to school. Trump’s Nationalists, who claim to be followers of Christ and embrace the first amendment right to freedom of religion, are denying non-white Minnesotans their own right to participate in their own worship services by terrorizing them. Trump’s Christian Nationalists are killing protesters on the streets of Minneapolis for doing what Jesus Christ instructed people to do: Love thy neighbor.

In an attempt to further intimidate Americans into submitting to the will of Christian Nationalist leaders, a couple of days ago, Trump’s administration trampled the first amendment right to report news and opinions freely. They arrested former CNN anchor Don Lemon and Minnesota independent journalist Georgia Fort for covering a protest at Cities Church in St. Paul, Minnesota, where one of the pastors is a presumed ICE field director. Lemon and Fort weren’t protesting; they were recording a socially-relevant event to share with the public. They were indicted on charges of conspiracy and interfering with worshipers’ first amendment rights. I believe that their arrest was done, in part, to take down Lemon, who is on Trump’s enemy list. But I think the main intent was to intimidate all journalists who want to show the world what is actually going on in Minnesota.

ICE agents have been using facial recognition software the past few weeks to hunt down, intimidate, and punish Minnesotans for publicly protesting and reporting the feds’ cruel actions. And they’ve been given permission by the Department of Homeland Security to enter anyone’s home without a warrant. So I am aware that now, more than ever, I could find federal agents at my door with the intent to take me and my words down from public view. But spending this past month in Trump’s autocracy with the occupation of ICE in Minnesota—and having my neighbors’ constitutional rights violated because they don’t have white skin—has caused me to reassess what is important to spend my time and energy on right now. It is now my top priority to be a witness to what is happening to my neighbors so I can report to the world what is happening in Minnesota.

Even if I sometimes process this crazy Orwellian dystopian experience in a satirical way, I believe I can help shine a light on what Trump and Christian Nationalists are doing to destroy this democratic nation that was founded on Christian principles. Because of my relatively obscure profile, I’m not really that worried about my exercise of free speech making me a target for the feds. But a month ago I also would have said that a white person wouldn’t have to worry about being murdered by the federal government on the streets of Minneapolis for expressing a viewpoint that differs from that of Trump (a.k.a. Stephen Miller, the Antichrist and Master Architect of Evil). Apparently literally anything is possible. Times have changed significantly here in Minnesota since 2025. We are trapped in the autocracy Team Trump has been dreaming of. And Attorney General Pam Bondi seems like one of those people who would believe that my old lampoon post about testicles in Trump’s desk drawer was real. She seems dumb. A Kristi Noem kind of dumb. And AG Bondi has a lot of power. As demonstrated over and over during Trump’s reign, dumb people with power are the most dangerous kind of people in America. Bondi is responsible for taking the journalists into custody who covered the church protest in Minnesota, and she could easily jail any blogger who writes something she doesn’t like. I’ve found that dumb people tend to lack critical reasoning and disregard constitutional rights like freedom of speech and freedom of the press.

Democracy is definitely dying in America. But because literally anything is possible, Minnesotans are actively working to reconstruct a democracy that’s better than the one we had before. At its core is a Constitution that isn’t written by and for white men like the ones who stole this land from its first people. As people from every demographic pour into the streets of Minnesota to protect their neighbors, a  colorful Constitution is now being written in every language so that it hopefully speaks for every person who inhabits this land.

Though it’s a long shot that I would ever end up on the radar of my autocratic government leaders, it is likely that I could die in jail if I go a couple of days without the medication and strict diet that keeps me alive. But I feel that speaking freely and reporting what I am seeing in Minnesota with my own eyes is definitely worth taking that chance. If the feds someday come after me for spotlighting the stupidity of Trump’s administration and for publicly documenting what I see happening to my neighbors, I will be sure to post to my blog about it—probably satirically. If my dumb autocratic government eventually kills me for acting like someone with democratic rights, I hope to die laughing at their expense.

If you’re desiring some comic relief, here is the ridiculous post I did to my lampoon newspaper in 2021 that caused Facebook to shut down my account for posting false news.

BODY PARTS FOUND IN OVAL OFFICE

By ANITA  DRINGHK

It wasn’t what employees of Two Men and a Box expected to find when they were collecting Donald Trump’s personal items in the Oval Office. Pak Iddup was the one who made the gruesome discovery. “I opened the bottom drawer of Mr. Trump’s desk and couldn’t believe what I saw. I’ve been a mover for twenty years and have found some weird stuff that people have forgotten about. There was that time I found Speaker Paul Ryan’s spine in a closet when I was packing up his office, but this is the first time I’ve found a pair of testicles.”

Iddup immediately called 9-1-1 to alert authorities about his discovery but was put on hold as emergency lines are overloaded in D.C. So he called his boss at Two Men and a Box, Kahn Tainer, for guidance. Tainer contacted his lawyer to clarify how the Finders-Keepers law applies to testicles. Kahn has previously utilized the Finders-Keepers law to sell on eBay the unclaimed items that his movers discover. Kahn’s lawyer, Robert Scruthem, contacted Donald Trump’s personal attorney, Rudy Giuliani. Kahn recorded the conversation with the hope of selling the recording to the highest media bidder. When Giuliani was asked if he knew who the testicles belonged to, he replied, “Testicles? You found them, huh. I don’t know about any testicles!” Then he hung up the phone.

Kahn’s lawyer advised him to submit the testicles for DNA testing to see who they belong to because previous ownership could significantly impact the market value on eBay. Two Men and a Box has also been hired to pack up Vice President Pence’s office. So Kahn says the current plan is to “grab a drinking glass that’s been used by Trump’s VP. Then I think we’ll probably have our answer and can go ahead and get an auction set up.”

© 2026 by Julie A. Ryan. All rights reserved.
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