Don't Panic

Since production of my Amazon books has been delayed, I’ve been given the message that my writing is non-essential to the world during a pandemic. So the fact that New York’s liquor stores are considered “essential business” during a statewide lockdown makes me feel somewhat valuable as I write this blog about my daily alcohol consumption. This is my seventh day in a row of drinking during my self-imposed isolation. It’s also day seven of having my husband work from home.

While I’m thinking about my husband, who has an appreciation for Monty Python-type humor and science fiction, Tim Federle’s literary cocktail The Hitchhiker’s Mudslide to the Galaxy strikes me as an appealing one to try today. Like The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, my trilogy, When Life Was Still, has a bit of spacetime travel. But I don’t have the Baileys or Kahlúa on hand that are in the recipe, so I’m going to get creative with this beverage that I’ve renamed An Android’s Guide to Earth because my protagonist in Book Three, Amy, has such trouble relating to her peers that she wonders if she is an android.

These are the ingredients:

  • 1 ounce Tito’s Handmade vodka
  • 1 ounce Starbuck’s cocoa—because I don’t have Bailey’s Irish coffee liqueur
  • 1 ounce Bacardí gold rum—because I don’t have Kahlúa coffee liqueur
  • Pour liquid ingredients into rocks glass over ice
  • Top with a squirt of Reddi-Wip—because I don’t have heavy cream to float on top
  • Since I don’t have the recommended Mars bar, and the Andes Mountains in Chile have a telescope that can see to the “edge of time,” I placed an Andes Mint Cookie Crunch Thin on top of my drink.

My review of An Android’s Guide to Earth:

Four out of five stars. It’s a decent drink despite the astronomical battle going on between the vodka and rum as they jockey for the position of top liquor. I think it would have tasted better if I used a regular Andes mint. The Cookie Crunch version tastes a bit like the liquid my mom and I used to clean our church basement when I was a little girl. It’s not a good taste. Feel free to make it without the mint—it’s a non-essential element of this drink.

Drink up—and don’t panic!


© 2020 by Julie Ryan. All rights reserved
No part of this document may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without prior written permission of Julie Ryan

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